The Promise and the Problem of Positivity
I am all for positivity—I mean, that’s the whole basis of Miss Fortune Blog—but is there ever a point when positivity actually produces damage?
Yes and no. Authentic positivity will never be harmful. But the “fake it until you make it” technique often leaves us feeling unfulfilled.
When Positivity Turns Toxic
Positivity becomes toxic when we suppress our emotions and mask them with forced optimism rather than processing them. Emotions are meant to be acknowledged and worked through.
What we do with the situation after we’ve allowed ourselves to feel is where the magic happens. That’s when positivity comes into play.
But we are allowed to be sad, to grieve, to feel upset—that’s a natural part of being human. You take the good with the bad. Once you’ve processed the reality of a situation, you get to choose how you move forward.
You can take a positive mindset and look for the opportunity within the pain, or you can let it consume you. You always have a choice.
The Mask of False Positivity
Another example of toxic positivity is when we mask a negative situation with forced smiles and denial. This isn’t healthy optimism—it’s avoidance.
We often see this in abusive relationships, addictions, or situations we want so badly to work out that we lie to ourselves. We pretend we’re happy just to escape the pain. We tell ourselves nothing is wrong, because the truth is too hard to face.
These are not examples of true positivity.
My Wake-Up Call
Let me show you how I learned this the hard way.
Over the years, I struggled with an addiction to Adderall. I’m now over a year clean and will never touch it again—but back then, I convinced myself I needed it.
I would binge for days without sleep, wasn’t eating, and became emotionally unavailable. I missed out on precious time with friends and family, all while knowing something was wrong but telling myself it helped me focus.
I thought I was happy.
I wasn’t.
To feed my addiction, I clung to that false belief until one day I looked at myself from the outside and couldn’t believe what I saw. That was my turning point.
A Choice to Change my Life
I had a decision to make:
Keep spiraling…
Or stop and face the hard stuff.
When you really think about it, the choice is easy.
I chose me.
Since then, I’ve continued to choose me. I quit smoking cigarettes, stopped taking edibles, and let myself feel everything I’d been avoiding. It was hard. But it was real.
I adopted a new motto:
“The only way out is through.”
Choosing Authentic Positivity
Now, a year later, I am happier than ever—not because I avoided pain, but because I faced it. I dealt with my shit, embraced a positive mindset, and began rebuilding my life.
I’m not proud it took me so long to accept I had a problem, but without the struggle, I wouldn’t be where I am today.
After spending much of my life as a Negative Nancy, I finally made the shift. Since then:
- My husband and I started a successful business
- I began this blog to help others
- I’ve been crossing bucket-list items off that once felt impossible
- I truly love the life I’m creating
If I can do it, you can too.
Final Thoughts: It’s Your Choice
So whatever situation you may be in, there’s always time to turn it around.
You have a choice:
Be authentically and unapologetically yourself—or continue navigating life behind a mask.
When you drop the act and face your reality in a healthy way, you can become everything you’ve ever dreamed.
Miss Fortune Blog 
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